Revelation: Maybe thats just it. I've forgotten the greatest lesson of all abroad--the perpetual uncertainty of everyday. I need to get back to a place where everyday itself is a lesson, a gift, a discovery. To give in to total early morning cheeseball-ness, today, in all its forms and permutations, can be every bit as surprising and challenging and provocative as every day abroad. I can seek out new experiences and new parts of the city and new adventures of living on my own almost as easily here as I can there. I can block out all the distractions of real life, ok, not so easy here as there, but I can work on it. I can seek the unfamiliar and the breathtaking. I can conquer the stupid basic demands that life places on me, even though here they take on more complicated forms.
Is this a decision? Maybe.
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